Children: How to Avoid Regrets
"My child arrived just the other day; he came to the world in the usual
way. But there were planes to catch and bills to pay; he learned to
walk while I was away." Sandy and Harry Chapin
If we are willing to go so far as to die for our children, why is it
that we often don't seem willing to live for them?
- Survey results indicate that the average middle-class father
believes he spends fifteen to twenty minutes a day with his kids.
- The actual average amount of time each dad spent with his kids was
thirty-seven seconds, an average of 2.7 daily encounters of ten to
- The average American child watches between four and seven hours of
TV each day.
Freedom to Be Kids
- What is more important a piece of furniture or a child? "I'll not
have you ruining a million dollar child over a $300 dollar table."
- Give them the freedom to be kids. Our approach should be to help
them get through growing up.
Protection from the World
- Our goal is protection not insulation.
- Children, not wise but foolish, discriminate best between that
which makes them feel good and that which makes them feel bad.
- Too bad that many things which feel good at first deeply scar the
lives of millions of our young people -- drugs, alcohol, sex.
- The duty and role of fathers includes protecting children from
evil as well as teaching them righteousness.
- Teaching children what to look for in a friend, and placing them
in environments where such young people can be found is a gigantic
contribution to their beliefs and values.
- These days when we misjudge, we tend to underprotect, not
Encourage, Don't Embitter
- Angry fathers are everywhere. I once heard an angry father yell
at his elementary-aged son, "Why don't you act your age?"
- These are the words penned by Boswell's dad: "Gone fishing today
with my son; a day wasted."
No Replacement for Time
- If we end up with regrets over the time we didn't give our
children, it is a pain that never goes away.
- As Lee Iacocca points out, no one says on his deathbed, "I wish I
had spent more time with my business."
Guardianship Through Prayer
- We can make no greater contribution to the well-being of our kids
than to intercede for them in daily prayer.
- You may find some adaptation of this list helpful:
- A saving faith
- A growing faith
- To be strong and healthy in mind, body, and spirit
- A desire for integrity
- A call to excellence
- To acquire wisdom
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